It’s tough to know when you should consider going to couples counseling. In most cases, couples wait too long before seeking help. Putting off couples counseling can make it even harder to rebuild a healthy relationship because of the damage that is being done each day they don’t seek help. The following are some signs and behaviors that signal that your relationship may need help…
You Aren’t Talking To One Another or Your Conversations are Only Negative
Many of the problems couples face result from poor communication. When someone feels judged, shamed, disregarded, or insecure the communication problems start. A therapist can help you find better and healthier ways of communicating. Maybe it’s not about what you’re saying but how you’re saying it.
You Are Afraid to Talk About Certain Subjects
Maybe when you talk about money or intimate matters of some other topic, it can quickly lead to blown out situations. You need to communicate about everything as a couple and a therapist can help with you communicate better between one another.
Affection is Being Withheld as Punishment
There has to be a balance in all relationships and when partner starts to take the role of parent or punisher then you will continue to have problems until it’s fixed.
You View Your Partner as an Adversary
Health couples have to be in the same team so if you start to take sides then it’s time to seek help.
You Keep Secrets
Every individual needs some degree of privacy but when you start to keep secrets from your partner it’s a sign that something is not right between the both of you.
You Think About or Are Having an Affair
If you fantasize about having an affair, it’s a signal that you need some help to improve your relationship. Couples can rebound from affairs but it is best to fix the problem before they happen.
You Are Being Financial Unfaithful
Financial infidelity can be as harmful to a relationship as a sexual affair. Lying or hiding spending or financial concerns from your partner is a major problem.
You Feel Everything Would Be Fine If Your Partner Could Just Change
The only person you can change is yourself. You need to find a way to meet in the middle and a couples therapist can help.
You Are Living Separate Lives
If you are living more like roommates than a married couple, you have problems. It all stems from a lack of communication, intimacy, or the bad thought that you can just “co-exist” with your partner.
Drastic Sex-life Changes
It’s natural for the frequency of your sex-life to taper off as you’ve been together for a long time but significant changes can be a sign something is wrong. An increase could relate to something they are trying to make up for that they are guilty about and a decrease could signal problems that are festering and need to be solved.
At Braveability, we help each of the partners of the couple to make an effort to see the perspective of the other and using this to guide what they say and do, without becoming distracted by what the other person does, or does not, say and do. This is easier than it seems, once you have learned from Braveabilty what is needed to do it!
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About Braveability Counseling
Braveability Counseling offers individuals a difference in how they see themselves, especially in relationship to others. It offers individuals a new understanding of their questions and approaches to challenges and relationships, so they can be part of the difference that they want for themselves and others. Inner development becomes possible during these daily challenges and Braveability offers a new personalized approach that strengthens relationships by using life’s storms to figure out what stakeholders truly want and can receive in their lives.
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